Last summer I got my first iPhone. Before this I didn't have a cell phone that had the ability to connect to wifi. One afternoon in July, I was at a barbeque at a friend's house. Most of the usual suspects were there, including The Foils, The Williams', The Lauers..... I think it was the 4th of July actually. Not an integral part of the story by any means. Just trying to set the scene. So we're hanging out in the backyard, playing testicle toss or some other yard game, drinking some beverages, eating burgers and weenies, ya know, typical 4th of July activities. I'm obsessed with my new super awesome iPhone, so of course I decide to check and see if I have any new emails. So I bust out my badass phone and see what options are available for wifi connections. If you have an iPhone you know what I'm talking about -- the list of possible networks that you can connect to that pops up if you're out and about. I checked out the list and about lost my shit. One of the connections listed was "Dr. Kenneth Noisewater" -- some of you may be wondering, who the f*ck is Dr. Kenneth Noisewater? If you've seen Anchorman, then you probably know what I'm talking about. There is a scene where Paul Rudd's character, Brian Fontana, is introducing himself to the movie watchers, it goes a little something like this.......
"People call me the Bri-man. I'm the stylish one of the group. I know what you're asking yourself, and the answer is yes, I have a nickname for my penis. It's called the Octagon. But I also nicknamed my testes. My left one is James Westfall, and my right one is Dr. Kenneth Noisewater. You ladies play your cards right, you might get to meet the whole gang."
The 12 year old boy in me loves Anchorman, so of course, when I saw that someone else in the neighborhood also appreciated comedy I freaked out a little. Well, a lot actually. I think I started running around the yard trying to get my friend Foil's attention. And when I finally told him what wifi network name awesomeness I had stumbled across, my friend Lauer (also the homeowner) just started laughing. And that is when I realized that it was Lauer's network that was named Dr. Kenneth Noisewater. I felt stupid for like 2 seconds, but recovered quickly because I was so excited about the thought of renaming my wifi network something totally absurd for the other people in my neighborhood to enjoy. Why hadn't I thought of that before? Sometimes I feel like I drop the ball on opportunities to show the world how juvenile and immature I really am outside of my professional life. Ever since that day last summer I always take note of the network names that pop up on my phone.
This afternoon Casey, Kim, and I were checking out some stuff at the REI down on Eastlake. While they were waiting in line to pay, I went outside to soak in some fresh air and check my email. I felt like I found a random network name gold mine. This is what I saw:
Glorious. Whoever named this network knew EXACTLY what they were doing, and they are even more juvenile and immature than myself. Comedic genius? Probably not. But definitely providing entertainment for the REI masses.
Seriously, I'm not joking. This actually happened to me. I can't make this stuff up.
5 comments:
When we were like, 15 we used to question if we would find the same things funny at age 30. I am happy to report the answer is with out a doubt YES!
Okay but now you have to tell us what you named your Wifi network : )
Unfortunately, I'm STILL dropping the ball on giving my network a clever name! Any ideas?
I once came across a network named Colonel Angus. People are way funnier than I.
One of our neighbors has their network named 'Not For You' - not very clever but I got the point.
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