Pushkin
by Marjorie Kowalski Cole

The old cat sleeps
in the newly arrived sun. One more spring
has come his way
dropping a solar bath
on failing kidneys, old cat bones.
I check for the rise and fall of breath.

Once he stalked hares
across the yard, tracked down
chicken hearts with split-lentil eyes.
Fearless, disinterested, a poseur, a demideity.
He and the dog are strangers still
after years of eating side by side.

I remember times of wailing
into my couch, alone
and utterly baffled by life,
when suddenly a cat
would be sitting on my head.

Last week I pulled him snarling
from under a chair in Dr. Bacon's office,
held him while she examined his dull coat,
felt his ribs. Pressed where it hurt.
Eight pounds of fur and bone and mad as hell
but "He's certainly less anxious in your lap,"
she murmured, astonishing me.
I had no idea. Old cat, old friend,
have I reached some place inside,
added to your life
as you have to mine?

I first saw this poem on the Itty Bitty Kitty Committee website over a year ago, and it struck a cord with me then.  And now I'm drawing comfort from it this week.  I said goodbye to my sweet Frank this week.  Although he hasn't been well in over a year, and I've been preparing myself for his passing for quite awhile, I still get teary eyed as I write this.  He was my constant companion and shadow of mine around the house for the last 9 years.  We've been through so much together, and he was always by my side with a soft nuzzle to let me know he was there.  He slept by my side at night for 9 years, and I'll miss him.  He was my little guy, my Frizzle. 

One Little Word -- July

The July prompt for the One Little Word workshop has been the most 'me' prompt so far -- music!  More specifically -- a soundtrack for my word.  This month I created a personal playlist for my word.  Seeing as how I have music playing at all times while I'm at home or in my car, this prompt was a breeze for me, and super fun. 

I remember in my AP English class in highschool we were given the opportunity to either write an essay or create something for our final class project.  I created a mix tape, or soundtrack I guess, for a novel we had just read in class.  I remember thinking all the people that chose to write an 8 page essay were out of their fucking minds.  I have never liked writing essays, period.  So given the opportunity to make a mix tape as a final project vs. writing an essay about some famous important novel that I can't even remember, the choice was an easy one for me. Mix tape!!

So what I'm saying is I had a great time tackling making a playlist for my word -- heal.  The songs I selected don't literally include my word -- to me it was more about creating the playlist with songs that are important to me now, or have been important to me through my life, and songs that make me connect to my word.  After creating our soundtrack to our word, we pulled lines or quotes from each song to put on 9 canvases.

Here are my canvases:

Although I have only 9 canvases, my soundtrack has 13 songs:

1. My Sweet Lord: George Harrison
2. Given To Fly: Pearl Jam
3. Between Two Lungs: Florence & The Machine
4. Well All Right: Kid Rock
5. Fall On Me: R.E.M.
6. Get Better: Mates Of State
7. Up Up Up: Givers
8. Young Blood: The Naked and Famous
9. Fans: Kings of Leon
10. Someone Like You: Adele
11. Baby, What a Big Surprise: Chicago
12. Helena Beat: Foster the People
13. Crying, Waiting, Hoping: Karen Elson

Then I created a cover sheet for the project and burned my playlist onto a disc to include in my One Little Word notebook. 

On Twitter if I send out a tweet of something I'm listening to right then, I'll include the hashtag #nowplaying, so I put that as my cover sheet.  I put my CD in a sleeve I purchased in a DIY CD packaging kit made by Chronicle Books. 

Here are the lyrics I chose to include on my canvases:

Given To Fly: Pearl Jam
And he still gives his love, he just gives it away. The love he receives is the love that is saved. And sometimes is seen a strange spot in the sky. A human being that was given to FLY.

Between To Lungs: Florence & The Machine
I have this breath and I hold it tight.  And I keep it in my chest with all my might.  I pray to GOD this BREATH will last.  As it pushes past my lips as I gasp, gasp.

Well All Right: Buddy Holly via Kid Rock
We'll LIVE and LOVE with all our might

Fall On Me: R.E.M.
Buy the sky and sell the sky. And lift your arms up to the sky. And ask the sky, and ask the sky.  Fall On Me.

Get Better: Mates Of State
Everything's gonna get LIGHTER, even if it never gets BETTER

Up Up Up: Givers
Yeah we up up up above love. Yeah we up UP up through the clouds. Yeah we up.

Young Blood: The Naked and Famous
The bittersweet between my teeth.  Trying to find the in-betweens. Fall back in LOVE eventually.

Someone Like You: Adele
Sometimes it lasts in LOVE but sometimes it HURTS instead.

Fans: Kings of Leon
You know the RAINY days they ain't so bad when you're the KING.

Looking forward to what is in store for August!!

One Little Word -- June

The prompt for June was one of the most challenging of the workshop thus far.  It was called Creative Meditation.  We were supposed to create 9 different mini-canvases -- keeping our word in mind as we created them.  I think they were difficult for me initially because the instructor used the word "messy" in the description of the project.  As most of my close friends and family know, I do not mesh well with the word "mess"..... my mind may be a mess sometimes, but my living space and work space are not.  So when I saw the instructor's personal process video for creating her canvases -- I was worried.  I don't work with paints much in my own scrapbooking -- not because I don't think it looks cool.  I actually think it looks really cool.  But paint to me equals dirty hands, and I like clean hands.  I'm so type-A sometimes.  Anyway, long story short, I managed to get over my fear of getting my hands dirty and had a great time creating my most colorful prompt so far.

Here are a few pictures that show my 9 mini-canvases:

Admittedly, I didn't actually get that dirty creating these canvases.  I used watercolors as the background for two of them, and did a little bit of stamping on a few of them.  I purchased a few acrylic paints in lime green, purple, and turquoise, but ended up running out of canvases because I wanted to include a photo of Frank and Spuzz in the project. 

I like the way they turned out though -- they are all different bright colors, which makes me happy.  We were supposed to choose a color to use as a jumping off point for our canvases, but I knew right away I didn't want to focus on just one color.  And that is one of the cool parts about this project -- you can create whatever you want, and whatever makes you happy! 

One Little Word -- May

As you know from my post from yesterday, this week I'm featuring a series of posts to catch you all up on my One Little Word project from Big Picture Classes.  I know you guys have been waiting with baited breath for my next installment.....May!!

So, May's prompt was one of the least challenging so far.  In a word -- documentation.  We were encouraged to write down our ideas, thoughts, tasks, missions and stuff we'd like to tackle with our word this year.  Also create another cover sheet for the month. 

Cover sheet:

Hello May! Lovely to see you again......
Still using patterned paper from a kit from Freehand Scraps.  I think the star stamp is a Tim Holtz stamp - love his stamps!

And my documentation:

I'm not sure you can see in this photo what the template spaces say -- each 8.5 x 11 sheet has 5 spaces to write.  Each space is divided in to two smaller spaces. The top space says Task/Mission/Goal/Objective/Thoughts/Stuff to Tackle.  The bottom space says Comments/Observations. 

Here are a few of my written spaces:

1. Create new memories with another dog.....I fell in love with Spuzz the moment I saw him, and haven't looked back!!  So happy....
Comments: Spuzz is so different than Milo as far as energy level, he keeps me on my toes.  Looking forward to adventures!!

2. Work on educating myself on foods that are easy to digest after gallbladder removal, I would like my digestion to be more predictable.
Comments: More fresh foods!

3. Keep Frank as healthy and happy as possible. Do the best you can with his medication, and don't punish yourself if he is combative.
Comments: It is your strength that you realize Frank will not live forever -- you'll know when he is ready to go.

4. Create an outdoor space to enjoy.  So looking forward to my deck area -- a place to sit and enjoy the fresh air.
Comments: Don't forget to allow Frank to experience the wind and sun in his fur.

5. Do something active 3 to 4 times a week.  You enjoy walking, do this with Spuzz. Zumba class was fun a a great workout.
Comments: You are reminded more and more as time goes by how important your health is, you really have nothing if you don't have your health!

Those are 5 out of 8 "tasks" that I have documented so far -- maybe I'll jot down more as the year progresses.